Love Like This Life

Hi.  So, I'm trying to make blogging a part of my daily life.  Some of my friends, like Andrew, are really great at this.

I am not, really.  I feel like the more I write - the less what I write really means.  I mean - seriously, who really cares that I was up past my bedtime today buying golf balls at Target?  Other than my stepdad, who I'm sure's world would stop turning if he didn't get them from me for Christmas. (mom - shhh.)

I'm a bit overwhelmed with "Christmas" this week.  Which stinks because I thought I set out this year to not get overwhelmed.  I don't have a lot of money for "gifts" so I feel like what I'm giving in some cases is just kind of lame.

So, I'm thinking about baking - but the thing is, I'm really not all that good at baking anything that doesn't come out of a tube.  And is that really thoughtful?  I mean, if you're going to give cookies as a gift, shouldn't they at least have some kind of cute design on them?

Isn't this ridiculous?  Isn't this really kind of anti-Christmas, after all?  This weekend I listened to a podcast (thank you Michael) and a message at church that was about giving. Real giving.  Not fruitcakes or pajama bottoms or gift cards... which, yes, are all wonderful things, and I'm not knocking them - I'm just saying...

Dictionary.com defines "gift" as the following:

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This

gift     /gɪft/

–noun

1.	something given voluntarily without payment in return, as to show favor toward someone, honor an occasion, or make a gesture of assistance; present.

2.	the act of giving.

3.

something bestowed or acquired without any particular effort by the recipient or without its being earned. I wish I was really ready to commit to this.  But the truth is, I'm stuck somewhere between the "traditional Christmas" I grew up with and this ideal.  I wish I was ready to really give.  But I guess I'm not.  Maybe next year.  I'm thinking it really would be a lot less stressful and a lot more rewarding.  To be someone else's miracle.  To give my time or my prayers or my money.  To give where something is really needed. How freeing! Now, don't get me wrong - I'm very much looking forward to exchanging gifts with my family, it's always a sweet time, and I love these people very much.  But at the end of the day, it really is the time that we spend together (and the awesome food) that makes it.  Not the cushy socks.